I got shot by a bee!!!

Ok so a few weeks ago, I was outside with Brandon, Donovan, and Bentley. We were getting ready to head inside, so I stepped 2 feet into the yard to unhook Bentley's collar and all of a sudden I felt this UNBELIEVABLE pain shoot through my foot. When I say unbelievable, I mean it literally took my breath away. All I could do was jump up and down and yell and scream. Donovan ran inside and brings back a pile of ice wrapped in a towel. I immediately dumped it out, grabbed an ice cube and stuck it between my toe and my hands. I couldn't breathe, and I couldn't stop moving the pain was that bad. I figured out later, that I was shot by a bee. Of course, Brandon will tell you I'm exaggerating as usual and I only STEPPED on a bee, but that's not true. That bee purposely and maliciously sought me out, and shot me! And so help me if it wasn't for me already trampling it to death, I'd be prosecuting it for attempted murder. Ok, maybe I can see Brandon's point on the exaggeration. But only by a little!

Here's a picture of my gunshot wound.

I did the first thing I could think of and put neosporin on it and wrapped it in a bandaid. Yes, I know I should have put baking soda and water, but at the time I didn't have it, so I did the next best thing. Or so I thought at the time. The following day, my foot was KILLING me. I kept thinking, wow these bee stings are no joke! Well I don't know what made me realize, but all of a sudden it hit me...I HAVE A LATEX ALLERGY! Never once did it dawn on me that wrapping my toe in a bandaid might not be the best thing. So I rip it off but it was too late. The wheels of my fate were already in motion. Ok maybe Brandon does have a slight point when it comes to my exaggeration. Whatever. Anyways, not only did the bee sting itself cause my foot pain, but now the latex allergy had my toe itching and burning like crazy. Well then it started moving to my other toes, and then down the length of my foot. My toe started getting blisters and there was a dark red/purple line where the bandaid had been. That toe itched so bad, I literally scratched the nail polish off of my toe!

Then, if the itching and burning weren't enough, my entire foot started to swell. And when I say swell, I mean SWELL! My entire foot felt like a water balloon that's about to burst. My toes started shrinking, and I couldn't bend any of them. Take a look:

When I went to my boss and explained what was going on, I asked him if I could run to CVS at our upcoming break and get some medicine because I couldn't get through to my Dr. He said "Let me take a look" So I show him the difference in my feet and he says "Uhm...you can go NOW....thank you!" LOL! So I ran to the store, actually I limped due to not wanting to make my foot explode, (ok, Brandon definitely has a valid point about my exaggeration). I grabbed some cortizone cream and a package of benadryl. It took over 2 weeks, but my toe is finally looking normal again. It still itches occasionally, and sometimes it feels slightly swollen, but I guess it could be a lot worse!

Clearly I don't know my dad anymore....

Ok, so we've established in that past that my dad is a redneck. By redneck, I don't mean "oh he listens to country music and wears camo...he's such a redneck". No I mean, he's a soup bean and cornbread eatin', tobacco chewin' (used to), long john wearin', duck dynasty watchin', bluegrass listenin', southern accent talkin', pickup truck drivin', beer drinkin', deer huntin', outside workin', softball playin', all around redneck. Which is what makes this story so mind boggling.

Last Friday night, I stopped by my parent's house for dinner. My parents are in the kitchen seasoning the burgers, and putting the cream cheese in the peppers, etc. My dad starts singing out loud. Usually when this occurs, it's either Luke Bryan, an old time country song, or bluegrass music. Not this time. I heard him singing like usual, and then I heard the words ".....wanna get nasty..." I immediately stopped what I was doing, and this was the conversation that followed:

Me: "What the heck did you just say?"
Dad: "You heard me"
Me: "What song was that?"
Dad: "Idk, but I love it. Robin Thicke sings it. You know, Alan Thicke's son"
Me: (thinking) "Wait a second, are you singing Blurred Lines?
Dad: "Maybe"
Dad: mumble, mumble "Get nasty!"

FREEZE!

As a background to this incident, in case you don't already know, Blurred Lines is a song with Robin Thicke, and the rapper T.I. Granted it's super popular and catchy, but the lyrics are horrible if you really listen to them. Let alone the fact that it has rapping in it. For those of you who know true rednecks, they hate rap music and slang. Which is why the rest of the conversation floored me.

Dad: mumble, mumble "Get nasty!"
Me: "Dad, are you SERIOUSLY singing Blurred Lines right now?
Dad: "What's wrong with it??"
Me: "Nothing, except that fact that given what it's about and who's in it, it should be a song that you hate"
Dad: (throws hands in the air) "Hate it or not, it's the number one hottest song out there!"

Flash forward to the next day, we're garage saling. (Another redneck hobby) He's singing to the radio, and he starts singing Just Give Me A Reason, by Pink and the guy from the group FUN. I said "Let me guess, you know this song too" To which he replies "Of course I do. I love Pink!!!"
Then if that wasn't enough, he buys 2 pairs of Aeropostale shorts at a sale, and all of a sudden thinks he's the stuff! I don't know what is going on with him......

The Cavitt's and the Karaoke

SOOOOOOO.....my husband and I are weird. There's just no way around it. We do some of the silliest stuff when we're alone. We have a bagillion inside jokes and people look at us like we're stupid when we bring one of them up. But we have a great time and that's all that matters. Here's an example of our goofiness.
It's like 10pm and we're laying in bed. I'm attempting to go to sleep since I have to work the next day, and Brandon is watching tv. Our tv lets us access youtube on it. So Brandon likes to look up music on it. Well I'm laying there trying to sleep and I hear "OOOOH!! KARAOKE!!! SWEET!" My adorable husband thought that youtube has karaoke, when in all actuality, it's just the music videos that have the lyrics on it. So he's scrolling through and he pulls up Whitney Houston's "I will always love you" and dares me to sing it without messing up. So of course being the amazing person I am (lol) I complete the task with no problems. So I decide it's his turn, and I choose Celine Dion's "My heart will go on". My favorite part was his rendition of "neeear, faaar, whereEEEEVVEEERRR you AaaAAaAaAarrreeee!!'' I thought I was going to die.
Then we decided to do some duets. Of course one of our favorite groups is Lady Antebellum, so we sang a bunch of their songs. Two of our favorites are "All we'd ever need" and "Need you now". We stayed up for the longest that night doing "youtube karaoke". We had a blast. 
Are we silly? Yes. Are we stupid? Yes. Are we crazy? Yes. Do we have fun? You bet. And that's all that matters. 

Brandon's Birthday!

So Saturday was my husband's birthday. The big 3-4!!! Geez, and to think I've been with him since he was 28! Normally I go all out for his birthday with presents and celebrations. Partially because Brandon isn't big on celebrating holidays and special occasions because of his less than happy childhood. So I try to make up for it and let him know that his day is special.
This year I opted not to buy him any gifts since money is tight. Plus, I'm going all out for our anniversary in a couple months so I figured I could make up for it. Instead, I decided to give him a "food" birthday. The night before, I prepped a french toast casserole and refrigerated it over night.

Saturday, I woke up at the crack of dawn. Ok it was 7am, but since it was my day off, it might as well have been the crack of dawn. I popped the casserole in the oven and started to make the rest of the food. It was my first time making the casserole and it turned out awesome. It was super easy too.
Next I made some sausage links. Since Brandon can't eat pork, I opted for turkey links instead. You can't tell the difference whatsoever. Super yummy. While that was cooking, I started cutting up fresh strawberries for the cake I was going to make him later that night. Since I had some left over, I used them for a side with breakfast. Here was the end result:

Then I went garage saling for a little bit while Brandon went across the street to the basketball court and played basketball with Donovan. The rest of the afternoon we just hung out and watched tv. Then around 5 we got dressed up and headed out to dinner for his bday:

We ended up at Texas Roadhouse in Huber Heights. The food was AMAZING! We shared an onion blossom (one of my FAV'S), and each got a salad. Brandon ordered his usual, a 3 piece catfish meal with a baked potato. I decided to try something different and ordered the country fried sirloin with gravy and a side of cheese fries. Man oh man, it was DELICIOUS! Probably one of my new favorite dinners. Then the fun came! Our server was Sarah, who is Brandon's friends girlfriend (hence why we drove out to Huber Heights). I told her it was Brandon's birthday and she brought out the whole roadhouse team and the saddle! She made Brandon sit on it in front of the whole restaurant while she yelled out that it was his birthday and everybody gave him a "YEE HAW!"

Then we headed home and I started on his bday cake. I decided to make a strawberry cool whip cake. I've never made it before but it sounded easy enough. I used white cake mix and split it into 2 9" cake pans. Once it cooled, I stacked them on top of each other and frosted it with cool whip. Then I topped it with the cut strawberries that I had soaking in sugar all day. Here's the end result:

Looks like he liked it! What do you think??

All in all, I think he had a great day. Just wait until he sees what I have planned for our anniversary!!!

The Redneck and the Super Glue

Ok, so it's no surprise that my family is comprised of rednecks. Well, my dad's side anyway. They are your typical truck driving, camo wearing, deer hunting, tobacco spitting, outdoor working, beer drinking, country music listening, rednecks. And I love them. In fact, I'm more like them than I sometimes realize. Daily, I get called out on my "country accent", as my husband refers to it. Apparently my most common phrase is "Do What??" which I say when I didn't hear what the person just said. To which my husband says "I didn't tell you to DO anything!" My boss and coworkers mock me and say "doooo whuuuuuut????" Others include "I reckon", "I reckon I oughta", "y'all", "all y'all", "alrighty", and "shore" (sure). Also, apparently I like to drop the "G" off of my words. Whatever, I'm my father's daughter and proud of it.
Here is just a sample of some of the redneck men in my family:

Now back to the point of the story. Although my dad is a redneck, he is one of the smartest people I know. That is no exaggeration. There is nothing this man can't fix or put together. And don't get me started on math. He makes me look like a kindergartner trying to do calculus. He can calculate anything and he can measure stuff with his eyes closed. He can use his hands to measure something and you go behind him with a tape measure and it is exactly the measurements that he said it was. It's unbelievable. Here's a picture of my awesome dad:

Now with that being said, sometimes he does some stubborn stupid things. I don't know if it's because he's a guy, or a redneck, but some of the stuff he does makes you scratch your head and go "did you SERIOUSLY just do that??" Case in point.....
My sister calls me last night and says that dad is in the ER because he cut his arm. Apparently he was at work hanging some blinds and they fell and cut his arm. Being the stubborn redneck that he is, instead of going to the hospital, he waits until he gets home that night and tries to SUPER GLUE IT!!!!! You heard me right, SUPER. GLUE. Super Glue. Oh did I mention that not only did he cut his arm, but he actually split open an artery?? What person do you know cuts open an artery and goes "ehh....I'll just use some super glue...it'll be alright" That's right...a redneck.
So apparently the super glue didn't work and mom makes him go to the ER. Well since he waited 12+ hours to get help, the nurse said it was too late for stitches so they put some gauze on it to wait for the doctor. Well my sister said that when the doctor came in and lifted the gauze, blood actually squirted out everywhere from him arm. She said it was like something out of a horror movie. YUCK. I guess in the end they ended up putting in a few stitches just to hold it together, but not enough that it could get infected. And afterwards, he removed his own stitches!!! YUCK!
Moral of the story....when you're hurt, go to the doctor. But if you feel that you MUST do it yourself, I guess super glue makes for the best story for your daughter's blog. =)

Movie Weekend Review

So Friday night we decided to rent some movies. We had a half off deal at Family Video, so we figured it'd be a cheap way to spend some family time. After deliberating for a while, we settled on Snitch, and 12 Rounds 2: Reloaded. Then the next day, we went back and rented Alex Cross, and Sinister. Here's what I thought about each of them

SNITCH:

This one had Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson in it which is partially why I think it attracted Brandon's eye. The movie is based on true events. It starts out with a teenage boy on Skype with his friend discussing a future party and how the friend is planning on bringing in some drugs to make money off of the other teenagers. The friend wants him to let the drugs get shipped to his house so he can bring them to the party. The teenager doesn't flat out say no, but you can tell he doesn't want to do it. Without waiting for an answer, the other boy ships the drugs anyway, and immediately the cops swarm around the house because the box had a tracker in it. The teenage boy gets arrested and upon refusal to set up other kids, he is facing a mandatory sentence of 10-30 years. One of the reasons he won't set up anyone, is because he doesn't know anyone. Just the friend that initally set him up in return for a lighter sentence. Fast forward a little ways, and you find out the teenager is being beaten up pretty bad in jail. He even ends up in the hospital for a while.
So taking it upon himself, the Rock (dad) decides he will snitch on people in place of his son. Hence the title Snitch. The Rock owns a construction company who just bought 2 new semi trucks. He finds one of his new employees that has already been arrested twice for selling drugs and convinces him to give him an introduction to some drug dealers. The meeting goes well and they agree that the semi trucks will be used to transport the drugs about 1,000 miles to another location. That's when you find out that the drug dealer that the rock is working for, actually works for someone else who is the head of the drug world. He is played by Benjamin Bratt.
Long story short, the rock, the DA and some local cops work together and bring the whole drug cartel down. At the very end of the movie, you see the son being released from jail. The employee that had been helping the rock the entire time is handed $100,000 from the cops as part of the reward money. When he asks why they're giving him some of the rock's reward money, the cop says that the rock mentioned something about having to lay him off of work. Afterwards you find out it's because the entire family will now have to go into witness protection for the rest of their lives due to the severity of the situation.
MY THOUGHTS: Overall, it was a really good movie. Not a ton of language, not a lot of drug viewing all things considering. I found it ok for my 12 year old to watch. Not that I enjoy him watching drug movies, but it was also a good opportunity to have the "see...this is what happens when you don't choose your friends wisely" talk. We all enjoyed the film.

12 ROUNDS 2: RELOADED

I immediately wanted to see this movie for two reasons. 1st, because I LOVE the first 12 Rounds movie. 2nd, because this movie stars Randy Orton. For anyone that knows me, knows I LOVE LOVE LOVE Randy Orton. So I was super excited to rent this movie.
This movie was similar to the original in the whole "12 rounds" theme. This movie opens up with Orton and his wife heading home from the movies. In front of them occurs a horrible car accident to which Orton who is a paramedic, rushes to help. He saves 2 out of 3 people, and the 3rd one dies. One year later, the game begins. There is a guy who contacts Orton and tells them that if he doesn't complete 12 rounds of a game he's created, his wife will be killed. Orton has no clue who this guy is or why he's contacted him but he's forced to play along. The rounds include finding locations within a set amount of time, finding certain people, putting together clues, etc.
Orton ends up finding a young man who is supposed to play along with him but neither of them know why. Eventually you find out the person behind this game is the husband of the lady who dies in the previous car crash. The young man that is accompanying Orton is the drunk driver that crashed into their car and killed her. Orton is being punished for saving his life, while the other man's wife died. The villain has killed every single person involved in that accident. The young man's father who was the mayor (who got him out of jail time), the man's lawyer, the judge that agreed to not send him to jail, everybody. He even killed the valet that was working at the club that gave him his car after he was drinking.
Of course the villain dies in the end and all is well for Orton and his wife.
MY THOUGHTS:  This movie is NOT suitable for children. We figured since the 1st one wasn't bad, our 12 year old could watch this. WRONG. It has language, sex, and nudity. Not suitable for kids unless you're "that" type of parent. While I don't think Randy Orton will ever have a calling for being an actor, I think he did a relatively great job. The muscles didn't hurt either. He had one scene in particular that I would definitely say was his "break out" moment. It was a great scene. Overall, my husband and I enjoyed the film, but will not be letting our 12 year old watch it again.

ALEX CROSS:

Not my favorite movie. As a matter of fact, I didn't even watch the whole movie. Halfway through, Brandon fell asleep and I turned the computer on while our 12 year old finished watching it.
From what I remember of it, the movie is about Alex Cross (Tyler Perry) who is a detective who is trying to solve a serial killer murder. At one scene in the film, the serial killer is on the phone with Cross, and while they are talking, he shoots Cross' pregnant wife while she's sitting outside a restaurant waiting for Cross to finish his phone call. After that, the movie lost me and I quit watching it. I can't even tell you how they found the killer, or what the motives were.
MY THOUGHTS: I did not like this movie at all, and I can't give any details on it because I stopped paying attention. Had the wife not have been killed, I probably would have continued watching it. Although I am a big fan of Tyler Perry, I will not watch this movie again. I will definitely be sticking to Madea movies from now on.

SINISTER:


Against my better judgement, I agreed to watch this. The lady at the video store told Brandon that this was a good scary movie. Personally, I hate scary movies. I think that's why he's always trying to get me to watch them. This movie has not changed my opinion on scary movies.
This movie is about a guy who is a crime novelist. He writes books based on true crimes and tries to give the reader a perspective other than what the news and cops say. He always moves his family to whatever city the crime happened in so that he can get a better feel for the victims. This crime in particular involves a family that were hung in their own backyard. All except for the little daughter who is still missing. The main character actually moves his family into that same house, unbeknownst to his wife and kids. One day he's moving things into the attic and sees a box of home movies. Of course he plays them, and they end up being live footage of the family being hung. Then we see other footage of different crimes, all similar in the sense that all family members die except for one small child. The murders include drowning, throat slitting, getting ran over with lawnmowers, etc.
Being the crime writer that he is, he makes it his mission to solve these crimes. While this is going on, his son starts having night terrors and they find him asleep in moving boxes and in the bushes outside. Now I should mention that throughout the movie, you constantly see the ghosts of the little children that are "missing" from the murders. They follow him around the house all the time but he doesn't see them obviously.
In one scene, you find out that the ghost of the little girl who's missing, has made contact with the man's little girl. But they don't make it a huge part of the story, so you don't think much of it.
The man finally realizes that there is a problem when every night he locks up the home movies in his office, yet in the middle of the night he wakes up to find it set up and playing. He decides enough is enough and he moves his family back to their old house. When he gets home, he gets a call from the deputy in the old town that was helping him on the case. The deputy says he's figured out how the murders are related. It started when the first family was murdered. After they died, the next family that moved in, set the events in motion. After they moved out and into another house, they were the next to be murdered. Then when another family moved in and back out, that family was murdered and so on and so on. So the guy now realizes that because  he was just living in the latest deceased family's house and just moved back out, his family will be next.
Then he goes into the attic to put more boxes back and he sees the box of home movies sitting in the middle of the room. Now there is an extra movie called "extended endings". It's the same movies but they last a little longer and show that each family was murdered by the little child that was "missing". I'm assuming it's because they were possessed by the devil.
The last scene of the movie shows the little girl murdering the man and the rest of the family, before joining the rest of the ghost children.
MY THOUGHTS: I hated this movie. Not because it was bad or poorly put together. All in all, it was a pretty genius film. I just hate scary movies. I might watch it again since I'll know whats going to happen, but I don't like the whole devil reference. All in all, it wasn't bad, mainly because it didn't give me nightmares afterwards. Except now my husband keeps messing with me about it.

Cystoscopy with hydrodistention

Had another surgery! Thankfully it wasn't another ectopic pregnancy. This surgery was planned this time. I had procedure called Cystoscopy with Hydrodistention. For the last 6 years, I've had this problem where it burns REALLY REALLY bad after I use the bathroom. The only way to get it to go away is to drink tons and tons of water so that I have to pee again. Once I pee again, I'm fine. After I pee, I have to lean all the way over, and more trickles out. It's horrible. It's not uncommon for me to spend 30 minutes at a time just to pee. Worst thing ever. I've had all types of tests done over the years, and none of the Dr's could figure out what it was. This year I went to my gynecologist and tried to explain it again, and she referred me to a pelvic control specialist. I was super nervous about having to go see a male doctor. I've always had females. There's just something about having a guy other than your husband all in your "business" lol. Yuck. Regardless of how I felt, I sucked it up and made an appt. I made Brandon go with me even during my exam. Dr. Ashby was really friendly. He made me feel comfortable and didn't make me feel stupid when I was trying to explain my crazy side effects. Long story short, he suggested that I should have a procedure called cystoscopy with hydrodistention. Willing to do whatever to get rid of the pain, I immediately agreed. My original surgery date was set for March 8th but of course I had my unexpected ectopic surgery the week before so I had to cancel due to recovering. I ended up having it on May 10th instead.
When the day of my surgery rolled around, I had some prep work to do. I was instructed to NOT drink anything after midnight the night before. The nurse said to make sure I didn't even swallow water while brushing my teeth. The morning of the surgery, I was instructed to take a shower, and to remove any and all nail polish, earrings, and other jewelry. I even had to take off my wedding ring which I was NOT happy about. That ring hasn't ever left my finger except when it's being cleaned.
After we got to the hospital, we had to check in at the welcome desk. Then we were sent to the little payment area where they scan in your insurance card and license, and then put your wrist band on you. Then I had to go down the hall and take a pregnancy test. Then I had to go BACK to the welcome area, and wait to be called back up. When I got called up, this little old foreign lady had to find my name on the list while another lady explained to us what would be happening next. She handed Brandon a beeper like you get at restaurants while you're waiting on your table. She said that I would have to go back by myself and then when I was settled in, they would page Brandon, and he'd be able to come back with me.
So they take me back to my "room" which was basically like a cubicle with a curtain. We went over paperwork and then I had to get undressed and put on my gown.

 Then the nurse ATTEMPTED to put in my IV. I say attempted because it didn't go so smoothly. Let me start by saying that the veins in my arms are very visible. Like bright blue, can't miss em. Does the nurse want any of those veins?? NOOOOOOOO......she wants to get one on my forearm down by my elbow. One of the WORST. PAINS. EVER. Hands down. Not to mention that as soon as she stuck the IV in, the needle jumped back out. Blood literally started gushing out. Now I don't mean it was pouring out all over the floor, let's not be dramatic. But it was enough that it took a handful of cotton balls to sop it all up. So then she can't find another location to put the IV in. So she decides to put it in on the side of my hand right where my thumb meets my wrist. If I thought the last IV hurt, it was NOTHING compared to this. I had to keep my wrist tucked in at all times, otherwise you could see the needle right under the surface of my skin. I seriously thought it was going to pop out of my skin. It was miserable. Then she started my fluids. Talk about a weird feeling. Nothing feels weirder than super cold liquid flowing right below the surface of your skin.

Then the Dr. came in and explained what he'd be doing. Then the anesthesiologist came in and went over his role, and asked me question about my health and allergies, etc. Then a lady and a guy came in separately to tell me that they'd be observing my procedure since it was a "learning hospital". Then they said it was time, I kissed Brandon goodbye, and they wheeled me out.
They wheeled me in to the OR and had me switch over to a different table. Then I laid down, they covered me in warm blankets (amazing) and then I was out. My last surgery they at least gave me a warning, but not this time!
Next thing I remember is waking up in recovery and my anesthesiologist is sitting next to me on the computer. We chatted for a while and then I said I was ready to go and they took me to a recovery area. The recovery area is half the size of the cubicle. Enough to fit a chair, end table, and computer. They sat me in the chair and gave me graham crackers and water. I ate those while they brought Brandon back in. He helped me change clothes, we got my discharge papers, and then we went home.
They told me ahead of time that it would hurt for a while when I used the bathroom. Holy cow, I was NOT prepared for what came next. I tend to think I don't need medication. I can't stand people that "pop pills" so my biggest fear is becoming addicted to something so I usually refuse to take medicine unless it's like an ibuprofen. That being said, I didn't take my medicine right away. WHOOPS! I sat down to use the bathroom, and I literally jumped off the toilet and screamed at the same time. Imagine having to pee while there are needles poking out of every side. The pain was so sharp it literally took my breath away. Plus there was blood which is never pleasant. I immediately took my medicine, and it subsided within the day. Imagine that!
Fast forward two weeks, I went to have my follow up appt. They said I have 4 treatment options. One, I can go on a strict diet which eliminates all sorts of foods and drinks and see if that will maintain the pain. Two, I can take antidepressant meds. Apparently, they calm the body which will calm the bladder. She said they would hope to give me a low enough dose so that I wouldn't have the weight gain and loopiness. Three, I can take narcotic nerve pain which will numb my body, hopefully numbing my bladder as well. Fourth, I can come in 6 weeks in a row and have a catheter inserted to have medicine placed directly into my bladder. UHHHHMMM.....I'll take option one please and thanks.
Needless to say, my problem is still somewhat occurring. I give up lol

CASTING CROWNS!!!

So Saturday night was our latest "date night". We had VIP tickets to the Casting Crowns concert. Whoot Whoot! It was AMAZING! We were able to have a Q&A before the concert and got to know the cast. The opening act was a woman named Dara Maclean. She was AWESOME! She doesn't need to open for anybody, she could easily headline her own show. Then the CC group came out and blew everybody away. The biggest surprise was my husband. At first he just sat and listened, but by the middle end of the concert he was rocking back and forth, standing and moving around, throwing his hands up in the air, praising Jesus out loud, it was so moving. That's the only word to explain it,....moving. Here are some pics of us before the concert, the Q&A, and the actual concert itself.

My Birthday Pics

So for my bday party this year, the family got together at my grandparents house and we ordered pizza and played card games. Particularly Apples to Apples, and my personal favorite, SPOONS!!! Here are some pictures of the family, and my 2 nephews Levi and Logan.

My brother and my dream

So last night I had my first dream about my brother walking. The reason this is significant is because my dad, my sister, AND my brother himself have all had one. Here's all I can remember:
My niece Jordin and I were in school together (weird) and our desks were next to each other but in different rows. She handed me a purple journal to read. Inside were details describing my brother's accident. What happened, different updates, how he was doing each day, etc. I got to the part where she wrote that the dr's thought he'd never walk again and then in walks my brother, he walks up the aisle between us, leans over me, shuts the book closed, and proceeds to walk to the front of the room. I woke up like....WOW.
My dad's, sister's, and brother's dreams all had the same basis. They were sitting somewhere in a room, and my brother just walks in out of nowhere. Super crazy!!!

Speaking of my brother, this is the song that always reminds me of him and his situation. Keeps me positive.

MOVE by MERCYME

I'm not about to give up
Because I heard you say
There's gonna be brighter days
There's gonna be brighter days

I won't stop, I'll keep my head up
No, I'm not here to stay
There's gonna be brighter days
There's gonna be brighter days

I just might bend but I won't break
As long as I can see your face

[Chorus:]
When life won't play along
And right keeps going wrong
And I can't seem to find my way
I know where I am found
So I won't let it drag me down
Oh, I'll keep dancing anyway

I'm gonna move (move)
I'm gonna move (move)
I'm gonna move

I've got to hold it steady
Keep my head in the game
Everything is about to change
Everything is about to change

This hurt is getting heavy
But I'm not about to cave
Everything's about to change
There's gonna be brighter days

I just might bend but won't break
As long as I can see your face

 

When life won't play along
And right keeps going wrong
And I can't seem to find my way
I know where I am found
So I won't let it drag me down
Oh, I'll keep dancing anyway

No matter what may come
Gotta move to a different drum
No matter what life brings
Gotta move gotta move to a different beat

My brother's life changing journey

This is going to be another hard one to write so I'm just going to jump right in and say it. My brother is now a quadriplegic. That's not something you ever imagine having to say. But now I have to. Here's why.....
Friday, March 8th was any normal day. Everybody's at work or school waiting for the weekend. You never realize that literally in a split second your life can be completely flipped around and changed forever. Backing up a little bit, I will say that my dad and brother work together. They both do construction. Have for many many years. Well this past Friday, they were working together getting ready to hang some doors in a building. There were numerous doors that they were planning to use, so they had them stacked together and propped against the wall. My dad needed one of the doors in the back, so one by one, he stood upright the doors that were in front of it. My brothers job was just to hold the on to the doors so they didn't fall while my dad pulled out the door he needed. My brother wasn't carrying, lifting, bracing, etc. Just standing upright with his hands holding on to a door. What happened next will forever change my brother's life, and every member of our family's.
My dad was getting ready to stand up another door for my brother to hold. My brother said "wait a minute" so my dad stopped. Then my brother said "ok, go ahead" As my dad handed him another door, he heard my brother say "Ohhh!" and then he heard "Well that ain't good..." My dad said "Ryan, what are you doing? Help me out here" And my brother said "I can't. I can't move" And my dad said "Ryan, stop playing, we need to get these doors finished" And my brother said "Dad, I can't move. I can't feel anything." So my dad came from around the doors, and my brother was sitting on the ground with his feet stretched out in front of him, and his head laying against his shoulder. My dad immediately calls an ambulance, and they instead decide to careflight him to OSU Hospital.
Fast forward a few hours, I finally arrive at the hospital. By the time I get there, he has already been taken back for a surgery that will last 4-7hrs long. At one point, we counted 26 family members in the waiting room. There were members we haven't seen in years that showed up. Of course everybody wants to hear the story of what happened, and since my dad was the only one there, he was forced to relive and tell it over and over again. Every time he told it, he cried, which made everybody else cry, no matter how many times we had heard it already.
After the surgery, the surgeon comes out and says that they put a plate and screws in his neck and they hoped his bone would accept it and grow around it. They also removed his 5th vertebrae. My brother had fractured his spine clear up to his neck. The doctors said even they had no idea how it happened. It was just a freak accident. The surgeon also addressed my dad and told him that none of it was his fault, and that he shouldn't hold any guilt or blame. Of course, my dad does anyway, which is really hard to watch.
Sunday I went back to the hospital and ended up staying a good 12hrs. I got to go back and see my brother twice while I was there. I had no idea what I was about to see, and when I finally saw him, I almost stopped in my tracks. Of course he still looked like my brother. Same hair, same size, same glasses, but there were so many tubes and wires and devices, and braces everywhere that you almost couldn't see his face right away. It was heartbreaking. They had him on medication so he would come in and out of sleep while you were there. He could nod his head yes or no, but because of the breathing tube/ventilator, he couldn't talk. So when he wanted to say something, you had to say the alphabet out loud and he would nod when you said the letter he wanted. Then you had to start over and repeat the process until you formed the word or sentence he wanted. At one point, my dad was back visiting with him, and he went to leave and said "Ok Ryan, I'm going to leave and let you get some rest. I'll be back later" My brother started trying to say something, so my dad started going through the alphabet. My brother ended up spelling "don't go." Talk about ripping your heart out. I tear up every time I think about it.
Sunday night, visiting hours had 10 minutes left, so Marissa and I went in to say goodbye. I told him that dad was taking the next day off and would spend the day with him, and he nodded. Then I told him that I would be back sometime later in the week to see him again. He made eye contact with me and mouthed the words "thank you." to which I replied "You're my brother, where else would I be?", to which he closed his eyes and nodded. He then mouthed "thank you" to Marissa, who proceeds to start crying and has to stand behind me so he doesn't see her. Somewhat of a funny moment happened when he was trying to signal something to us and we couldn't figure it out. He didn't want to do the alphabet so my sister-in-law Mandy starts naming random things trying to figure out what he's trying to say. "Are you cold? Is it too bright? Do you want to watch TV? Are you trying to tell the girls something? Do you want a blanket?" To which he shook his head and continuously rolled his eyes. Finally she says "Are you in pain??" And he smiles really big and sarcastically and starts nodding his head as if to say "Tell her what she's won!!" LOL we all laughed so hard. On a more serious note, when it came time to leave, I touched his shoulder and said "We're going to head out. I love you" and he said "I love you too" plain as day. Of course it was soft and mumbled, but I heard it as clearly as if he shouted it across the room. " I love you too" That's the first time I can remember my brother saying those words to me in 22 years. "I love you too" I went back to the waiting room and cried. I didn't care who was watching. Even though it was under the worst condition imaginable, my big brother finally told me he loved me. We bonded more in 10 minutes than we have in 22 years. That is what I'll remember most.

Ectopic Pregnancy

This is going to be a really hard story to write. It all started about 2 weeks ago. It was on a saturday and I was in the middle of cooking dinner for my husband. I was so proud of it because everything was homemade and I had put a lot of time and prep work into it. All of a sudden I start getting really sharp pains in my right side. It hurt too much to stand so I thought I would go and try to use the restroom. I never imagined that I would spend the next 7 hours back and forth between the bathroom and couch. I thought I was just severely constipated or had really bad gas pains. I want to say that my husband was super supportive and helped me but he didn't. He thought I was over exaggerating and was just a complete jerk the whole time. I had to drive myself up to the store and bought a jug of apple juice and stool softeners hoping to fix my problem. On the way back home, it hurt so bad, that I was screaming and crying at the same time. I even used an enema for the first time. Bless the people who invented that thing. I know it sounds super gross, but by the time your pain level gets from "Man, this really hurts." to "Give me the freaking enema!!" You don't care how gross it is, or how dumb it sounds. You only care about if it will work. Now I forgot to mention that this entire time was also filled with lots and lots of throwing up. And I don't mean I leaned over the toilet and threw up and felt better. I'm talking about hanging over the bathtub and throwing up at least 8 different times. By the time I was finished, I was throwing up something that was black and tasted like acid.
Fast forward to Sunday, I was feeling somewhat better, but not completely. Brandon was making a trip to Brookville and wanted me to go with him so he could keep an eye on me. I figured it was a 2hr round trip, so I would be fine. Wrong. Not even 30 min into the trip, my stomach started acting up again. We had to find a truck stop where I spent the next 45 min with really bad diarrhea. We finished the trip and headed home. That wasn't before brandon fell completely out of his truck. I mean that literally. He turned around to climb out of the semi, lost his footing, and fell straight down. Banged his body up pretty good. Thankfully he was ok though. So we get home, I grab a hot water bottle, and fall asleep.
Monday, I wasn't feeling too terrible, but I was exhausted from everything so I called off of work. By this point I thought I might be getting some type of flu bug, and I didn't want to pass it around. But overall, it went by pretty uneventful.
Now Tuesday is where things really start happening. I wake up and get ready for work like usual. I make it through the morning meeting, and go to my desk. Out of nowhere, the pain in my right side comes back, and with a vengeance. I realize that I'm literally sitting at my desk, rocking back and forth, and crying my eyes out. I went in to my boss's office and asked if I could go to Urgent Care. The only reason I was going is because you can't take off 2 days in a row without a Dr.'s excuse, and there was no way I could wait to see my regular Dr. So 20min and $75 later, I'm sitting in the waiting room bawling my eyes out. By this point, I can't stand straight, walk straight, and I can't take a deep breath.
The Dr. finally calls me back and I explain my problem. She thinks it might be kidney stones and asks me to give a urine sample. A few minutes later she comes back in and says "Well your urine came back fine with no problems. But the pregnancy test is positive" I can remember her exact words and I remember sitting there afterwards and feeling absolutely nothing but shock. I didn't even have time to get excited because her next words were " You need to go get bloodwork and an ultrasound done asap because it is more than likely ectopic".
Ectopic pregnancy is where the baby develops and grows inside a woman's fallopian tube instead of her uterus. There is no hope for the baby, and if it goes too long, can be very life threatening for the mother. Oh how true those words are.
Even though I was supposed to go get bloodwork done, I left Urgent Care and went home. I was in so much pain that the thought of sitting in another waiting room was unbearable. I went home, curled up with a hot water bottle, and called my BFF Sarah in Ft. Wayne. After talking with her, I decided to use the restroom before I went for bloodwork. I remember standing in front of the bathroom mirror, and leaning over the sink, and just praying. I didn't beg God to let me keep my baby, I only prayed that if I was MEANT to keep the baby, would he please take care of us and make it possible. Looking back, I think subconsciously I knew what the outcome was going to be. But nevertheless, I prayed.
After my bloodwork, I went to get my ultrasound. It was extremely uncomfortable because of the amount of pain I was in. Afterwards, a radiologist comes in and tells me that not only is it an ectopic pregnancy, but that it has ruptured and my entire right side is filled with fluid and bloodclots and I need to go straight to the E.R. The nurse walks me to the door and asks if I have anybody to go with me and I told her that no, my husband is a truck driver and he won't be home until Friday. She starts crying for me. Actually crying. Which makes me start crying. So I rush out to my car and just put my head against the steering wheel and cry like I've never cried before. I cried so loud that if someone were walking by my car, they would have heard me. I finally call my mom and explain the situation and ask if she'll go with me.
I check in at the ER and i'm admitted and in a room within 15min. Thankfully my dr. called ahead of time and told them I was coming. Next thing I know, my sister shows up. So it's me, my mom, and sister, inside a cramped ER cubicle with all kinds of people coming in and out wanting information, insurance, signatures, bloodwork, etc. At one point, I was answering questions to a nurse, when another nurse comes up behind me and literally whips my shirt and bra off. HELLO?!?! I could have done that myself!
A little later, they gave me morphine which completely took the pain away. Unfortunately, I didn't like the way it made the rest of my body feel, but I was just thankful for the pain relief. Next they wheel me in for another ultrasound because the previous one never got transferred to the ER. I think what happened next was half part me being doped up, and half part me just being dumb lol But I remember laying there staring at the ceiling and hearing this loud whooshing sound. The same sound you hear when a plane flies over a building you're in. And I was talking out loud and said, "wow is that an airplane?" And the technician says "well actually, it's the blood flow to your right ovary." To which I replied "well, that was my second guess" LOL I felt like a complete idiot.
When I get back to my room, my dad shows up. I was doing fine up until that point. I look at him and he's crying. Which of course makes me want to cry as well. Not to mention that my husband is in a complete different state at this point. A lady comes in and says she needs more blood because she didn't take enough the last time. She gets so far as to put the needle in, and 2 other people rush in and say "You need to stop. They need her in surgery NOW" Which of course freaks all of us out, even the lady drawing my blood. So next thing I know, i'm being rushed down a hallway, into an elevator, and into a room on the 2nd floor where I meet the Dr performing the surgery and the anesthesiologist. They go over what they're going to do, and off I go! My surgery nurse Jason was really nice. We were making conversation and he told me his wife was 10 weeks pregnant. I could tell he was nervous about telling me, but I told him congratulations. So i'm laying on the table and the anesthesiologist puts an oxygen mask over my face and says "Sweet dreams. Think of the biggest, bluest ocean you can and picture yourself there." Instead, I remember thinking of Brandon hugging me, and then I was out.
I woke up in the recovery room and could instantly remember everything that had happened. What was irritating was that I still had the breathing tube thing up my nose which kind of burnt when I breathed. I had sticky residue around my mouth, and found out it was from the tape that had held the breathing tube in my throat. The only other people in the room were two nurses. They came over to help cover me up and I remember saying "Excuse my legs. I've been in extreme pain the last few days, and the last thing on my mind was shaving" And one of the nurses said "Oh honey what are you talking about? It's winter, you should see my legs!" It felt pretty good to have something to smile about for once that day. Then the other lady tells me that I have a whole fan club waiting for me upstairs. I remember saying "Let me guess....2 parents, one sister, 2 grandparents, an aunt, an uncle, and 2 cousins?" The lady laughed and said "Yeah pretty much!" I knew who was here because that's how my family is. We show up for everything with each other.
So they wheel me out of recovery and head to a private room on a different floor. I can remember going past the waiting room and seeing my grandpa and one of my cousins out in the hallway. Once I was in my room, my whole family comes in and starts filling me in on the surgery.
My fallopian tube was actually larger than my uterus. Plus I had massive scar tissue and adhesions throughout the area. The Dr. removed my right fallopian tube completely, and tried to salvage the left one. I still have it, but it is extremely rough, and bumpy, and crooked apparently.
Around 1130pm they discharge me and I went to my parents house. I immediately call  Brandon who starts crying his eyes out and keeps saying that he did this to me and how it was all his fault. It took forever to calm him down. Then the next day, I'm about to fall asleep, and I hear a really familiar voice. I look up at my sister and said "Did I just hear who I think I did?" And then in walks Brandon. He arranged it with his job to come home the rest of the week to take care of me. I've never been so happy to see someone in my entire life.
So he took me home and pampered me like you wouldn't believe. I didn't have to reach for anything, do anything, dress myself, nothing. It was great. Well, except that I was in major pain the whole time. They gave me 800mg Ibuprofen, and percocet which helped but I hated the way it made me feel. I felt really heavy and dizzy and felt like I could fall over at any moment. And I was already laying down! I don't see how people get addicted to them. I really don't.
So that's my story. Emotionally, I'm ok. I guess it was a blessing that I didn't know about the pregnancy ahead of time. I didn't have the chance to bond. I try not to think about it, because regardless of how little or far along I was, I still lost a baby. A baby that I've worked almost a year to have. And it was taken from me within hours. I know it's not the same as a mother who has a stillborn, or a long term miscarriage, but it was still a baby. My baby. And it's gone.


There are 2 songs that come to mind whenever I think back on this event. One if fact was playing when I got in the car after finding out I needed to go to the E.R. Here's a sample of the lyrics that really hit home for me.

Held-Natalie Grant
Two months is too little
They let him go.
They had no sudden healing.
To think that providence
Would take a child from his mother
While she prays, is appalling.
We're asking why this happens to us,
Who have died to live, it's unfair.
This is what it means to be held,
How it feels, when the sacred is torn from your life,
And you survive.
This is what it is to be loved and to know
That the promise was that when everything fell,
We'd be held.


Blessings-Laura Story
What if your blessings come through rain drops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise?

We pray for wisdom, Your voice to hear
We cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt your goodness, we doubt your love
As if every promise from Your word is not enough
And all the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe

What if my greatest disappointments or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can't satisfy
What if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are your mercies in disguise?

Introduction to My Journey

This blog stands one purpose. To allow me to write exactly what I'm feeling without getting someone else's reactions or opinions. I'm going to write about personal struggles and experiences. Not everything will be pretty. In fact, most of it won't be. But that's fine. I don't expect anyone to read this, so I plan to put it all out there without fear.
Let's start with the basics. My name is Ashlee Cavitt and I'm 23 years old. Most would say that's young, but I know differently. I know all of the struggles that I've had to overcome, and I have an idea of what's in store for the future. I am by far, NOT a typical 23 year old.
I'm married. Have been for 23 months. My husband Brandon is just like any other man. He loves me and provides for me, but at the very heart of him, he can be a complete buttface. It's not always easy, but I love him and will do my part in keeping our marriage strong and happy.
I have 2 stepchildren. One of which I've never met. That is a whole story in itself. I want to say step parenting is always a complete joy and is very rewarding, but that would be lying. More to that later.
I've recently been diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, or PCOS. It sucks. That's the only word to describe it. I will detail it more in future posts. It has become a part of my everyday life, whether I like it or not.
So that covers the basics. Let's begin the story of my life and journey.....